


Long Overdue Apology

by Jestana



Series: Half Siblings [21]
Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Don't copy to another site, F/M, Fix-It, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:29:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29783742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jestana/pseuds/Jestana
Summary: Theron and Satele take Norm back to Odessan together. This gives them a chance to talk.
Relationships: Male Jedi Consular | Barsen'thor/Theron Shan, past Jace Malcom/Satele Shan
Series: Half Siblings [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1003869
Kudos: 4





	Long Overdue Apology

**Author's Note:**

> There's no _way_ Theron let anyone else take Norm back to Odessan. And I figured it was about damn time Satele talked to Theron.
> 
> Also, this is an alternate universe of my Half Siblings 'Verse where KotFE/KotET happen with Normajh as the Outlander/Alliance Commander.

Theron had thought traveling in a shuttle with his mother and husband would be awkward and uncomfortable. It wasn't, at least at first. Normajh remained unconscious in one of the bunks while Satele knelt on the deck behind the pilots' chairs, meditating. As he guided the shuttle into the long hyperspace jump back to Odessan, the rustle of cloth and quiet footsteps told Theron that Satele had finished meditating before she settled into the co-pilot's seat. Before the silence could grow oppressive, Satele's quiet voice startled him. "I'm sorry, Theron."

"Excuse me?" He did _not_ just hear those words come out of Satele Shan's mouth.

Blue eyes met his hazel ones when he glanced over at her curiously, calm and steady, but also just a little hesitant. "I said I'm sorry, Theron. I shouldn't have given you up without even _trying_ to raise you myself."

"Master Zho told me you chose the Jedi Order." Theron didn't even _try_ to keep the bitterness from his voice. "Chose to serve the Republic over having a family."

Satele nodded, taking a deep breath. "I did, but I never told him _why_."

"Not out of patriotism or dedication to the Order?" He asked, inwardly wincing at the mocking tone of his voice. His mother was _finally_ trying to clear the air and he was being an asshole.

She shook her head, dropping her gaze to where she'd clasped her hands in her lap. "No. I gave you up--and your father, in a way--because I was afraid."

"Afraid? Of what?" Despite himself, Theron was intrigued. He'd never expected Satele Shan of all people to admit to fear!

Taking a deep breath, Satele explained in a low voice, "I spoke with Jace after I confirmed my pregnancy." She touched her stomach briefly as she continued. "Jace was-- he hated the Empire. He would do anything and everything possible to fight them. Even to the point of sacrificing his own life if necessary."

"That sounds familiar," he remarked quietly, thinking of his own 'betrayal' to stop the Order of Zildrogg and protect the Alliance.

Something about his quiet quip brought the tiniest of smiles to her face. "I suppose. That conversation with Jace was one of the most difficult I've had because it was the first time I realized that I _could_ fall to the dark side of the Force, if someone I cared--no loved--was killed fighting the Empire."

"I-- you-- really?" That confession stunned Theron. The great Satele Shan had been a beacon of Light in the Jedi Order for _decades_. He'd never thought that she might waver from the Light.

Blue eyes met hazel once more. "Yes. I loved Jace so much that I knew, if he died fighting the Empire, that I would give in to the Dark to avenge his death."

"Love _d_?" He repeated the word curiously, not sure if he should voice the entire question behind the single word.

Satele's expression softened, turning fond. "I still love your father, but he and I have both changed since then."

"That's good..." Shifting and clearing his throat awkwardly, Theron couldn't believe that they were even _having_ this conversation. There was still something he had to ask. "That must have been early in your pregnancy. Did you decide then..."

She swallowed hard, squeezing her hands tight enough for the knuckles to turn white. "Giving you up was probably the hardest decision I ever made, Theron. Harder even than breaking off my relationship with Jace. You were all I had left of him at the time and I would do _anything_ to protect you from harm."

"Even if it meant falling to the Dark?" He had to ask, despite his certainty of her answer. If she was willing to give up the man she loved to avoid such a fate, it made sense that she would give up their child--him--for the same reason.

Slowly, Satele nodded. "I held you in my arms and _knew_ that I could fall to the Dark for you more easily than I would for Jace. I loved you so much then, and I still love you now."

"Um, wow." Theron couldn't stop an awkward huff of laughter from escaping, rubbing the skin around his implant. He'd resented her for so long, for various reasons, assuming she'd abandoned him because she didn't care about him enough to defy the Jedi Order. Learning that she'd done it out of love for him and a desire to protect him upended everything he'd thought about her over the years.

Thankfully, she didn't try to reach out to him, keeping her hands in her lap, though the knuckles were no longer white. "Seeing the man you've become since then... willing to do everything you can to save the Republic, even to the point of walking away from it, but still remaining true to yourself and the man you love-- I'm proud of you, Theron."

"I--we--shit." Groaning, he shook his head. She'd disappeared _before_ his and Normajh's wedding. How did she _know_ about them?

For the first time he could remember, Satele teased him! "I figured you two out back on Yavin IV. You're hardly the first couple to sneak away from camp, Theron. Your father and I certainly did our share of it." She arched an eyebrow at him. "How else do you think you were conceived after all?"

"I think you've traumatized him enough, Master Satele," Normajh remarked from the bunk, drawing their attention to him.

Relieved that his husband was awake, Theron stood up and hurried to perch beside him on the bunk. "Hey, you."

"Hey, yourself." Smiling, Normajh reached up to pull Theron down into a soft, loving kiss.

When he drew back catch his breath, Theron rested his forehead against Normajh's. "Love you, you noble idiot."

"Love you, too, you sneaky shit," Normajh replied, sinking his fingers into Theron's dark hair.

He closed his eyes with a soft sigh, happy with how the mission had turned out. Tenebrae was gone, Satele was safe, and his partner was alive. They startled apart when Satele said, "I'll fly the shuttle the rest of the way there. You two rest."

"Mother." Theron waited until she turned back to him. "Forgiveness will take time, but thank you for apologizing and explaining."

She stared at him for a long moment before offering him a small smile and nod. "I understand, Theron. I can't make up for what I've done, but I'd like to get to know you."

"Same," he replied, feeling Normajh's hand find his, their fingers twining together.

Nodding again, she settled into the pilot's seat. When he looked down at his husband, Normajh offered him a smug smile. "Told you."

"You're lucky I love you." Theron tugged off his boots and stretched out beside Normajh.

Normajh kissed his cheek as they settled into each other's arms. "We're both lucky."

"Yes, we are." Sighing deeply, Theron relaxed into sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> The reasoning Satele gives is based on reading her, Theron, and Jace's wiki articles. The only content I've actually experienced firsthand is the MMO.


End file.
